Be Kind - It Doesn’t Cost Extra

Be Kind

Be kind. It costs nothing extra; it doesn’t take up anymore of your time.

I think a lot of instructors begin to feel like they’re above beginners – the ones that are struggling, or just starting out – and they become impatient. Blunt. Sometimes blunt is meant to save your life, but when things are said just to make someone feel small and insignificant, it’s out of place. Nobody learns well when they feel bad about themselves. Most of us are already fighting a negative internal dialogue and then to add that type of criticism on top? It just creates a vicious cycle of not believing in oneself and feeling unimportant; worrying not only about how you feel inside, but if the insensitive comments will be coming from the middle of the arena, as well.

As an instructor, my goal is always to build people up. To give them knowledge that makes them feel empowered; that they can take the lesson home and find a way forward with their horse. To do it methodically and kindly. The path forward isn’t necessarily a straight line – it rarely is with horses, but it’s always my objective to find the next step, to dig out the missing piece of the puzzle. To find the keys that will open a new door and help bring in confidence. Strength. Understanding. I’m always going to be honest, I never want to disillusion you, but the truth is important, even if its hard to hear. When it’s uncomfortable, it can still be brought forth with tact and gentleness. With love and lightness and a plan to move forward. Belittling someone isn’t the way forward. I would never want my horse to feel that way, nor would I want a student to carry that burden. Be kind. Think about your words – both those that you speak and those that you think. Think about the kindness in your hands on the reins, when you stroke your horse, the softness in the aids that you apply. It costs nothing extra and doesn’t take up anymore of your time.

Until next time